Trends, Tips, & Ideas For Your Next Big Event

Every wedding is different, because each couple is unique, with their own story, sense of style and set of friends and relatives.  Having said that there are certain types of stereotypical guests who seem to turn up every time.  In this post we list those that no wedding would be complete without.  Be prepared - they make for an amusing wedding movie but are not always so funny when they show up on your big day!

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The Party Animal

All the way through the ceremony and the meal they’ll be fidgety, just waiting for the music to start so they can make like John Travolta.  They’re first on the dance floor and the last to leave it.  A couple of these characters can be the life and soul of the party…but sometimes they can become a bit of an irritation!

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The Happy Snapper

A wannabe wedding photographer whose artistic talents are wasted in the day job (works in a call centre, warehouse or accountancy firm?).  They are right there, getting the close up at every big moment - vows, first kiss, first dance, speeches, cutting the cake.  Being positive, this can give you some great shots that might otherwise have been missed.  But on the other they may get in the way of the professional you are paying to do the job.  Also, your over enthusiastic happy snapper might post their stuff on social media before you can get the official ones out there.  If you don’t want that to happen put a polite note on the invitations.

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The Predatory Bachelor

The Ladies Man can be spotted on the edge of the crowd waiting to pounce with lines like “I can’t believe you haven’t walked down the aisle with some lucky man yet”, or “it must be embarrassing for you, looking prettier than the bride.”  Keep an eye on him and send help if he homes in on girlfriend who’s fresh from a break up.  Seating him with a group of happy couples may help to limit the damage he’s capable of causing.

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The Judge

The recently married or soon to be married guest who is an expert in all things wedding.  You’ll see her out of the corner of your eye critiquing the flowers or overhear her finding fault with the seating plan.  Ignore them!  

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The Emotional Wreck

Everyone with a heart will feel moved to shed a tear at some point during the proceedings – but this guest is in floods, and bits, for best part of the day.  Just make sure there are plenty of tissues to hand and don’t be surprised if they are continually heading to the loo.  Try and sit them with a bunch of cheerful and emotionally stable guests!

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The Wannabe DJ

This is the character who is constantly hogging the iPod at parties.  This isn’t such a problem at lesser social events but not good on your big night.  You can spot them bending the DJ’s ear about what song to play next.  Head this one off by telling the DJ or band, ahead of time, to ignore all requests.

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The Recently Single

The unfortunate guest was planning on being at your wedding with their partner but it just didn’t work out that way. Naturally they’ll be feeling very emotional and happy for you (whilst feeling sorry for themselves).  Seat them with a fun crowd to lift their spirits.  Keep a watchful eye to make sure they don’t do too good a job of drowning their sorrows or fall into the clutches of the Predatory Bachelor!

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The Binge Drinker

There’s always going to be one or two who have one or two too many.   If the Best Man has a tendency in this direction make every effort to keep him sober until the speeches are over.  There’s usually a bridesmaid who overdoes the Prosecco, goes wild on the dancefloor, makes a grab for a married guest then falls asleep by 10pm.  Perhaps appoint a couple of alcohol monitors to keep an eye out for those who need slowing down or being helped up.

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The Anxious Mother of the Bride

She just can’t help giving her opinion when not asked for it and micromanaging every tiny detail.  Best to give her a few non-essential tasks that will keep her occupied while everyone else concentrates on just having a good time.

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The Life Saver

Usually one of your bridesmaids or quite possibly your maid of honour.  Whenever there’s an unexpected problem they’re on it.  She fixed your hair when the clips came out, re-did your makeup when your mascara was running and kept the kids busy when they became restless.  Make sure you give her a great present once the celebrations are over!

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Looking forward to your big day

Right now you can only have four guests – which makes things much easier to manage!  Once lockdown is over you’ll hopefully be able to invite as many as you like – including all of the above.  We hope our guide is helpful and if there’s any other aspect of wedding planning we can help you with just ask!  

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These are challenging times for those whose plans for tying the knot keep unravelling thanks to the Covid crisis.  The best advice right now is to chill out, open a bottle of prosecco and snuggle up on the sofa with your loved one to watch a wedding movie!  We listed ten popular ones a couple of years back - check it out here.  But there are plenty more to choose from.  In this post we offer you ten more that will have you laughing, crying and well entertained for a few hours.

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Love Actually

Nine intertwined stories approach the subject of love from very different angles.  Begins with one of the best wedding scenes ever to have been captured on camera but there’s plenty more to enjoy, including a newly elected British prime minister who falls for a young junior staffer, a graphic designer whose devotion to her mentally ill brother complicates her love life, and a married man tempted by his attractive new secretary.

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Like Crazy

Great movie for those forced to put love on hold by bureaucratic red tape.  While attending college in Los Angeles Anna from London falls madly in love with Jacob.   When Anna violates the terms of her visa she is compelled to return. Maintaining a long-distance relationship proves hard but no matter how often circumstances pull them apart, they always find themselves back together again.

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Table 19

Eloise is relieved of maid of honor duties at her oldest friend’s wedding after being unceremoniously dumped by her fiancé (who also happens to be the best man) via text.  Not the best of starts.  And it all goes downhill from here when she determines to attend the celebration out of loyalty to the bride.  She finds herself seated with five other dysfunctional, emotionally disturbed and socially challenged guests who should have also politely declined the invitation.  Very amusing, very romantic and gives some useful wedding planning pointers (ie mistakes to avoid).

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Crazy Rich Asians

Unsuspecting Rachel accompanies her boyfriend to his best friend's wedding in Singapore.  She's shocked to discover that laid back Nick has been keeping a secret from her – his family is outrageously wealthy and he is one of the country's most eligible bachelors.   Unwillingly thrust into the spotlight she has to deal with spiteful socialites, Nick’s offbeat friends and relatives plus a potential mother-in-law from hell who is determined to send our heroine packing.  Things go from bad to worse when Nick’s mother reveals a secret about Rachel which she herself was unaware of.  A classic and hugely enjoyable rom-com that’s an absolute bling fest to boot.

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The Proposal

Faced with deportation to her native Canada, high-powered book editor Margaret Tate pressures her hapless assistant, Andrew Paxton, into marrying her in return for a promotion.  He also insists she flies to Alaska to meet his oddball family.  With a suspicious immigration official on their tail the couple must stick to their wedding plan despite numerous mishaps.  Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds make it a lot of fun.

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Meet the Parents/Meet the Fockers

Two movies, but two parts of the same story.  Unfortunately named male nurse, meets his girlfriend's parents before proposing, but her suspicious father turns out to be every date's worst nightmare.  Despite a string of disasters our hero successfully wins over Ex-CIA man Jack Byrnes.  In the sequel Jack and his wife travel to Miami to meet their future in-laws and are intrigued to find out what kind of couple would name their son Gaylord M. Focker.  Suffice to say their initial impressions are not encouraging.  But love, as they say, conquers all.  Great cast – Ben Still, Robert DeNiro and Dustin Hoffman, Barbra Streisand and Owen Wilson.

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Destination Wedding

Lindsay and Frank, both with a bad attitude to start with, are reluctant guests at the wedding of her ex and his new girlfriend.  Their antipathy is mutually, sparking a downward spiral of jibes, insults and sulkiness.  The hate at first sight formula is a tried and tested one.  They’re obviously made for each other - but just can’t see it.  The sparks fly between Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder in more ways than one.  

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Bachelorette

Three friends are asked to be bridesmaids at a wedding of a woman they used to ridicule back in high school. After ruining the wedding gown, bridesmaids (Kirsten Dunst, Isla Fisher, Lizzy Caplan) set out on a frantic search for a replacement, but their mission degenerates into a night of booze, drugs and nightclubbing.   Snappy, bitchy, and surprisingly enjoyable girls behaving badly romp.

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Bride Wars

Two best friends become rivals when they schedule their respective weddings on the same day, at the same venue, using the same wedding planner.  Their inner bridezillas do battle with hilarious consequences.  Competition for dates and venues will be tough when the Covid threat is finally brought under control but let’s hope you never end up in a mess like this!

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27 Dresses

Perennial bridesmaid Jane always puts the needs of others before her own, making her the go-to bridesmaid.   27 weddings later her younger sister hooks the man Jane secretly loves herself – Jane’s boss.  Our usually compliant and supportive heroine is now more than a little conflicted.  A situation that’s complicated when she becomes attracted to a handsome reporter who sees her vulnerability as an opportunity to further his own career.

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Let’s talk

We hope that watching these movies will keep you entertained while your own preparations are temporarily delayed.  Having said that there’s nothing to stop you planning your big day.  The team at Clevedon Court have a wealth of experience so don’t be shy about sharing your ideas or picking our brains - we love to help!

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No wedding is complete without a cake.  But what sort of cake?  A simple enough question, you might think….but think again!  Wedding cakes have become amazingly creative and imaginative of late and the sheer choice of styles, favours, fillings, shapes and finished can be overwhelming.  In this post we open your mind to some of the stunning and delicious possibilities you can discuss with you cake creator.

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Keeping with tradition

The classic wedding cake is a fruitcake.  There’s a good reason for this – the bride and groom can keep some of it in a safe place for 365 days and enjoy it on their first wedding anniversary.

The cake will either be square or round with at least three tiers.  It will be covered in marzipan and white fondant icing with white detailing piped onto the cake and probably some flowers and ribbons for extra decoration.

Why three tiers?  The large bottom tier is shared out at the wedding.  The smaller middle tier is to share with those who couldn’t make the big day.  The top tier is saved for the couple to enjoy a year later.

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Give it a modern or contemporary twist

If you want to create something more individual there are many possible variations – they’re all variations on the traditional theme but give you plenty of room to express your own personal style and really wow guests with something that’s a bit more adventurous.  Let us give you some food for thought….

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No end of finishes - take your pick

The most traditional, and popular, finish is fondant icing.  The main reason for this is that it is so practical and versatile.   It’s created from a combination of sugar, corn syrup, gelatine and glycerine.  This mix is rolled out into sheets and then wrapped around each tier of the cake to produce a smooth and clean finish.

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Royal icing a mix of egg whites and sifted icing sugar that is whipped into a thick paste then piped onto the cake when soft.  As it dries it provides a hard finish. This icing is used to create beading, latticework, flowers and other creations that must hold their shape and stay firm – you wouldn’t ice the whole cake in it, just the decorative bits.

Another popular and very tempting finish is American buttercream.  It’s soft and easy to cut which makes it perfect for decorations such as a basket weave, swirls, fleur-de-lis, rosettes and swags.  It has a smooth and creamy texture but is not exdessively sweet. Genuine buttercream, as the name suggests, is made with real butter, so cakes iced with buttercream will need to be kept in a cool place and won’t keep for long after the big day.

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Italian and Swiss buttercream are two other very popular options for cakes.  Both start out the same way as meringue and require a lot of skill to prepare.

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Cream cheese buttercream is created when you add cream cheese to your buttercream.  This type of finish is idea for finishing carrot cakes, red velvet cakes or lemon cakes perfectly.

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A naked cake finish (also known as a bare cake, exposed, pound or tomboy cake) is just the humble sponge cake with no covering of icing

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Crumb coat finish, sometimes referred to as dirty iced, is very like a naked finish.  It’s a wedding cake covered by a very thin layer of icing to hold in the crumbs - so thin that the sponge underneath is starting to show through..

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Ganache is usually made by mixing equal parts chocolate and cream.  As you’d expect this is a chocoholic’s dream!

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Drip style cakes, as the name suggests, are cakes are adorned with rivulets of overflowing frosting. First they are covered in fondant, dirty iced or left naked and then finished with a layer of dripping chocolate, caramel or a sweet, coloured ganache trickling down the sides.  A very dramatic finish guaranteed to get everyone’s mouth watering!

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Marzipan is a paste made of ground almonds, sugar and egg whites. It can be rolled into sheets and moulded into shapes and then painted with food colouring or covered in icing.

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Whipped Cream finish is exactly that – whipped cream.  It gives your cake a wonderful texture.  However, it is quite delicate so bakers often use special stabilisers or powdered sugar in the whipped cream so it’s safe to display the cake during the reception.

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Hand-finished cakes may be painted, embellished with script, or covered in gold leaf or metallic finishes – the options are as varied as your imagination!

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Wedding cake shapes

Most wedding cakes are round or square, but the possibilities don’t stop there.  You could go for mini, spherical, hexagonal, octagonal, a cake in the shape of a petals, a stack of hearts, a pile of cushions, a fairy tale castle, a peacock, an open book, a bouquet of flowers…

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Take it to a new level

The classic wedding cake has three tiers but there are no rules – you can do some amazing things on just one level or you can go up as many as you like.  

If you go for two of more tiers they don’t have to be stacked directly on top of each other – you could separate the tiers by supporting them on tiers.  

Another option is to go for a double height cake (sometimes referred to as double barrel).  This is where two identical cakes are stacked directly on top of each other, then iced as one tall layer.

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Small is beautiful

You could go for a collection of individually-sized mini cakes, one for each guest.  One of the great things about this ideas is that they can be made in a variety of flavours, colours and styles.  This can, however, be quite costly.  A more budget-conscious option is to have a collection of cupcakes.

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Let’s get decorative

Even the simplest shape of cake can be totally transformed by the choice of decorative treatments that are added to it.  There are literally thousands of ways to add personal creative touches and style accents.  We’ve listed some of the most popular here but not gone into detail – they are just ideas that you can discuss with your cake designer.  

•           Ribbons & bows

•           Hand-piping

•           Candy-covered

•           Dots

•           Spatula painted

•           Flowerfetti

•           Sugar flowers

•           Fresh flowers

•           Fresh fruit

•           Hand-painted & calligraphy designs

•           Metallic finishes like gold leaf & rose gold designs

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Flavours and fillings to die for

You can settle for the traditional fruit cake – or go for something a little out of the ordinary (or a lot!).  Coffee, white chocolate and nut flavours are very popular but there are many totally moreish citrus, fruit and floral flavours to tempt the tastebuds.

One idea is to go for a seasonal slant - light, dainty flavours for a spring or summer wedding and rich, heavy cakes for an autumn and winter wedding.  Maybe you and your other half have your own very different favourite flavours?   No problem – have two tiers, with his and hers flavours.

You could even go the savoury route and have a cheese stack.   You can buy a ready-made  cake of cheeses (some towering as high as eight tiers) or make your own combo of Cheddar, Stilton, Brie, Wensleydale, Double Gloucester or soft goat’s cheese (to name but a few).

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Extra helpings

The team at Clevedon Hall love discussing cake (almost as much as eating it!) so if you have any questions of this nature don’t be shy about asking us – we’re hungry to help!

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Your wedding is obviously a very personal occasion that’s close to your heart – so it’s totally understandable if you want to plan it all yourself.  However, it is a huge undertaking that takes up a lot of time and inevitably involves a certain amount of stress.  Many couples, keen to focus on the fun and romance, with less of the work and the worry, therefore enlist the services of a wedding planner.

If you hold your wedding at Clevedon Hall the team here will give you a lot of help and support.  Having said that some of our brides who have especially demanding jobs, or whose circumstances may be particularly complicated (lots of guests flying in from abroad, for instance), bring in a wedding planner as well.

In this post we cover the main benefits of hiring a professional wedding planner.

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Helping you get the most out of your budget  

Wedding planners cost money.  But in strict financial terms they are generally worth it – they can actually save more than they cost.  How come?  Because they are experts, they know the right people, they understand how the wedding industry works, and are skilled at getting the best deals.  If you let them take care of all the negotiations, decisions and purchases you’ll get better value for money.

Wedding suppliers want repeat business.  Planners can give it to them but you can’t (unless you are planning on getting married multiple times!).  So wedding planners usually get lower quotes and better rates than brides.  

What’s more, wedding planners are used to managing wedding budgets, contacts and all the administrative details.  You are not – so they will usually do a much better job of keeping all the finances properly managed and buttoned down.

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Freeing up your time

Most brides have a full time job, a busy social life and plenty of other commitments (including their relationship with their husband to be).  Finding the time to plan and organize a wedding on top of all that is a big ask.  You can do it, but at what cost?  The effort can really take the fun, excitement and romance out of what should be some of the most joyous months of your life.  

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Do the maths. The average couple is engaged for about 12 months, which only gives you 48 weekends in which to get everything sorted.  You’ll find yourself missing out other social events or family gatherings because you have a fitting, tasting or some other wedding related task that requires your time.  Your inbox is also going to fill up with correspondence from suppliers asking questions, requiring discussion or needing payment.  

A wedding planner can take much of this off the hassle off your shoulders, leaving you free to enjoy more of the fun stuff – and that’s incredibly valuable.

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Helping you achieve your wedding vision

You have a picture in your mind of your dream wedding.  But it can be easy to lose sight of that when you start talking to different vendors and your family and friends keep adding their personal ideas, suggestions and requests.  Your planner is focused only on your special day (unlike vendors who may be involved in several weddings every weekend) and will push to make sure everything goes according to your unique plan.

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There are so many little details to keep track of, and so many different people putting subtle (or not so subtle!) pressure on you, that it’s all too easy to end up with an event that’s not quite what you had in mind.  Your wedding planner is a professional project manager whose job it is to make sure the client (you) gets what they wanted at the very beginning.  Also, because they are not so personally involved they are much better placed to have difficult conversations on your behalf!

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Inspiration ideas and practical advice

You might spend hours on Pinterest, flipping through bridal magazines and surfing various wedding blogs gathering information, ideas and advice.  But that doesn’t make you a pro.  A wedding planner organises events ranging from 20 to 300 guests on a regular basis.  They know what the issues are and have great relationships with the best vendors.  They understand the legalities, they are familiar with the problems that often arise and are practiced at coming up with solutions.  For instance, your mum and mother-in-law disagree about bridal shower details.  You’re not sure how much should you ask your bridesmaids to pay for their dresses.  When should you send out your save-the-dates.  A seasoned wedding planner has seen it all, and she'll be able to guide you through any tricky situations that arise during big-day preparations - the benefit of their knowledge and experience is priceless.

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At the very least your planner is going to come up with brilliant and original ideas for your ceremony and reception, many of which can't be found online. Whether you want a unique centre piece or a totally wow cake design, she'll brainstorm something that will knock your socks off.

On the other hand you may come up with some super creative idea that you are not sure how to turn into reality.  Your wedding planner will be able to give you a practical way of achieving it or maybe suggest something similar that will work better.

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Peace of mind

For all these reasons, and more, a wedding planner will save you tons of stress and worry.  They are like a PA, walking diary, confidant and best friend all rolled into one.  There comes a point, usually just before the big day, when it can all get too much – that’s when you wish you had paid for a wedding planner!  Do you really want to be worrying about the florist finding your venue on the day.   Or stressing over whether the DJ will have the correct cables and connections for the venue’s sound system?  Without a planner you’ll be tackling those issues yourself, when you least need it!

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Your planner can make your life so much calmer by responding to emails when you are really short of time, take phone calls that you don’t want to deal with and.  They can attend venue viewings, menu tastings and supplier meetings with or without you, and can also be present on the day should you need extra tissues, extra wine or help with an unruly guest or difficult supplier.  

A planner makes sure you get your wedding your way - with the minimum stress and work, the maximum fun and pleasure.  

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Let’s make it happen

The team at Clevedon Hall can give you lots of advice and assistance but we’re very happy to work with a planner if you decide you’d like one.  Together we’ll ensure your big day is as magical and enjoyable as in your dreams.

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When you eventually get to enjoy your big day (global pandemics permitting!) it’s important to be in the moment.  But it’s also essential to capture the memories – and that means hiring a professional photographer.  There’s plenty to choose from…and that’s the problem.  You suddenly discover there’s a lot more to it than you initially realised.  In this post we give a quick overview of the different wedding photography styles and terms that wedding photographers tend to use (reportage, second shooter…eh?).

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Digital or film?

Digital is the most popular way to shoot wedding photos, for these reasons

•              Digital gives you unlimited shots as no extra processing fees – film means less shots and extra cost

•              With digital you can immediately see the shot and make adjustments as necessary

•              With film it takes longer to get finished images

•              Digital produces crisp, high-quality photos and prints but film adds grain, softness and warmth

•              Digital is more suitable for very low-light conditions

•              Retouching with digital is easy

•              Digital negatives are easy to store and won’t fade over time

You might want to find a photographer who’ll shoot on film and digital to give you the best of both worlds.

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Black and white vs colour

Black and white produces a timeless and classic effect.  It also heightens the mood and can be great in poor lighting conditions to put draw the eye to the happy couple.  The normal procedure is to shoot in colour and then edit into black and white so you have both options.  

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Photography package

An agreement that sets out what is included in the fee – from how many hours they’ll spend shooting on the day to what they’ll finally deliver.  What sort of thing might be included in a typical package?

•              A pre-wedding consultation to discuss the arrangements in detail

•              An engagement shoot

•              About 10 hours on the day from the bridal party preparations through to the first dance

•              A USB stick of high-resolution, full-edited digital images from the day (400-500 images)

•              Personal use copyright license

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Copyright

You’ve paid for the shots but the photographer always owns the copyright.  However, the agreement should give you a personal use copyright license. This this means you can print physical copies and to share the photos online.  You can’t sell your photos or publish them and the photographer may request that images you share on social media carry a watermark.

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Traditional photography

This style is formal and captures posed photographs of your day. You’ll get a standard, almost formulaic series of images covering the key moments in the day (like signing the register and cutting the cake) as well as a number of staged group shots of you and your guests. Although this style might sound a bit unimaginative it is important to get these shots for posterity.  Your best solution might be to find a photographer that takes these formal set pieces as well as shots in a reportage or contemporary style.

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Contemporary style photography

The photographer shoots in the style used by current magazine editorials.  The style is quite artistic and imaginative, using dramatic backdrops, unusual angles and lighting, or focusing on more abstract shots.  If you’re looking for a quirky and creative then this style is for you.  

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However, be clear on what the photographer has in mind.  Review several of their full wedding albums to make sure you are both on the same page.  The shots may take quite a lot of time and require you to go to another location (for instance, Clevedon Pier) – you have to decide if you want to spend this long on your wedding day to get these shots.  

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Reportage style photography

One of the most popular styles right now, a very naturalistic and informal way of capturing moments and emotions as they happen – a style that’s very like photojournalism.  If you want candid and authentic shots without wasting time on posing this is the style to go for.

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Fun photography

Light-hearted, comical or slightly cheesy shots directed by the photographer. These shots may range from the bridal party jumping in the air to a staged shot of the groomsmen and bridesmaids in a tug of war to pull the happy couple apart. Whatever your idea of fun is!

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Shot list

A list of must-have shots, like the groom waiting at the altar or the bride getting dressed.  Keep the list short and give your chosen photographer lots of freedom – they are the experts.  Having said that there will be some group shots that are essential.

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Proofing, retouching and editing

The post-production stage.  You’ll be sent a link to a password-protected online gallery that friends and family can also look at. You’ll agree which shots to put to one side (someone was blinking or there are better shots of the same moment).  This is a chance for you to ask for any final edits on a few of the photos, especially the ones you plan to print.

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The photographer will correct and enhance things like colour and exposure plus adjust things that don’t turn out exactly as you’d like – from removing unwanted shadows and confetti to combining two photos to create a group shot that was missed.  This can include skin retouching, eyes highlighting, smoothing creases in clothes and removing stray hairs.

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Boudoir shoot

A set of images for the eyes of your spouse only.  These are quite different from regular wedding shots so best done by a dedicated boudoir photographer who’ll have the knowledge of the best angles and lighting.

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Bridal sessions

A formal portrait session several months before the wedding with the bride in her wedding dress and with a replica of her bouquet, almost like a test run for the big day.  These were more popular in days gone but are still a lovely way to get portraits of the bride in a private relaxed setting.

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Second shooter

One photographer can’t be in two places at once so you might want to pay for a second one to make sure nothing is missed. For instance, one photographer might shoot the groom getting ready while the other captures the bridal party preparations.

With a big wedding one photographer will struggle to cover all those memorable moments. A second shooter will be able to go around your guests during your reception drinks, catch a different angle on the walk down the aisle and first dance, and get photos of all the details (cake, table setting, flowers) while your main photographer does your couple shots.

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Anything else you need to know?

That’s not everything there is to know about wedding photography but it’s certainly enough for starters.  If you have any further questions, not just about photography but any aspect of planning your big day, give us a call – the team at Clevedon Hall have a wealth of knowledge and experience to share.

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There has been one upside to the Covid situation as far as weddings are concerned.  Really?!  Yes - government restrictions provided the perfect excuse for keeping the numbers down and not feeling quite so bad about leaving certain people off the guest list.  However, as there’s the prospects of a viable vaccine being available in the not too distant future you may have to start thinking a bit harder about these issues as we head into 2021.  

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Workmates

You probably have a few close friends at work that you’d love to have along.  But where do you draw the line?  It’s not an easy call but it maybe best to invite all, or none.

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The return favour

You were invited to their wedding so are you obliged to do the same?  If their wedding was less than a year before yours then you should probably include them.  If it was longer, but you are still close, the answer is probably yes.  But if you seldom see each other now then they’ll probably understand.  Probably…  They may have had a much bigger event, or less relatives to include, so there are a few other circumstances to take into consideration – but if their wedding was not long ago, or you still see them, then leaving them out will potentially cause bad feeling.

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Parental pressure

Parents probably have different ideas to you about who should be invited to the wedding – and it’s tough to ignore their wishes if they are making a financial contribution.  Consider allocating a certain number of invitations to both sets of parents to get around this. If your venue holds 100 people, you could invite 50 guests and let each set of parents inviting 25 each.

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The ‘plus one’

Some guests will feel uneasy coming alone or may have a “significant other” that you’ve not met (yet!).  There’s no hard and fast rule – kind of depends on the capacity of the venue.  It’s generally acceptable to not invite the partners of a group of work colleagues who enjoy each other’s company.  But but do consider inviting the partner of the friend who may not know anybody else. Generally be clear and consistent about whether or not you are inviting partners. Print names on the rsvp cards as this will stop uninvited partners from turning up.

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The divorced parents situation

It’s important for both of you to have both parents in attendance.  But what if they can no longer bear to be in the same room as each other?  It may be possible to keep them apart but it certainly won’t be easy – especially when you arrange the seating plan of the top table.

The top table is the focus of attention at the reception so any “issues” are going to be obvious to everyone.  The traditional way to seat everyone on the top table is down one side of a rectangular table, facing the rest of the room.  The normal arrangement, from the left: chief bridesmaid, groom’s father, bride’s mother, groom, bride, bride’s father, groom’s mother, best man. An alternative to this is to swap the fathers so that the bride’s parents sit together and the groom’s parents set together.

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You’d probably love your mum and dad to sit at the top table but if they absolutely don’t want to then you need to find an alternative seating solution.  You might like to consider these variations:

·         If the bride’s parents have divorced and remarried.  From the left: bride’s stepfather, chief bridesmaid, groom’s father, bride’s mother, groom, bride, bride’s father, groom’s mother, best man, bride’s stepmother.

·         If the groom’s parents have divorced and remarried.  From the left: best man, groom’s stepmother, groom’s father, bride’s mother, groom, bride, bride’s father, groom’s mother, groom’s stepfather, chief bridesmaid.

·         If both sets of parents have divorced and remarried. From the left: groom’s stepmother, bride’s stepfather, chief bridesmaid, groom’s father, bride’s mother, groom, bride, bride’s father, groom’s mother, best man, bride’s stepmother, groom’s stepfather.

Another option, to avoid any awkward hierarchies, particularly if there is any resentment or bitterness lurking between current partners and exes, consider having a round table.

If you find it impossible to organize a harmonious top table just do away with tradition altogether and have a romantic ‘sweetheart top table’ just for the bride and groom alone.  That way you are the centre of attention and everyone else can sit at separate tables with people they feel comfortable with.

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Inviting the ex

We have all heard stories of couples who invited their ex-wife or ex-husband to their wedding and they all got along famously, but this is rare – generally it’s a recipe for disaster.

If your relationship with your ex is friendly, and you have children together, it might work out.  But you do need to consider how your ex and your new partner are going to feel.  If you have any misgivings at all it’s probably best to simply explain that you will be getting married again but that you don’t feel it would be appropriate to have them there on the day. They may happily accept this (and might actually be quite relieved).  Certainly don’t invite them if it makes your new partner uncomfortable.  What’s more, there may be others (not least your parents) who might not welcome your ex (and possibly their new partner).  

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Ask away

If you have any other questions relating to guest lists, seating arrangements and the like, then let us know – it’s all in a day’s work for the team at Clevedon Hall!

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Your wedding day is the most romantic moment of your life.  So, you want it to be perfect.  Which means you plan it very carefully.   But, ironically, the more you plan, the more you try to micromanage every little detail, the more stressful it becomes.  Because there will always be little challenges – like the venue you want is booked on all of the dates you’d like, your future mother-in-law can’t stop giving you advice and your maid of honour gets pregnant eight months before the big day.  Then, to cap it all, Covid comes along.

This isn’t the first post we’ve written on how to manage your mental and emotional wellbeing during the wedding planning process – but we thought it was timely.  Plus we have some fresh tips that we haven’t shared with you before.

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Accept that it’s normal to feel stressed

Planning a wedding is a big undertaking.  So if you find yourself getting stressed out that’s normal.  The fact you are so wound up, losing sleep and getting ratty with people doesn’t mean you are a total bridezilla, that it’s better to delay the whole thing or that you have serious mental health issues!  

However, many brides and grooms try to hide the anxiety they’re experiencing.  They might even feel ashamed that they’re struggling during a period that should be the “happiest time of their life”.

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The best approach is to realise “it’s not you” but the situation – stop blaming yourself!  Then make looking after yourself more of a priority – right now it’s probably way down the list, below worrying about the budget and making sure everyone else is happy (an impossible task, by the way!).  If you follow this tip, and the ones that follow, you’ll be able to enjoy the process of wedding planning and put the focus back on you, your relationship and your upcoming marriage.

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Use you support network  

There’s a lot of truth in the old adage “a problem shared is a problem halved”.  So share the stuff that’s bothering you.  Who with?  It might be with your partner, a member of your family or with your closest girlfriends – you decide who is best placed to give you the love, support and advice you need.  Even if they don’t come up with a solution to your problem just talking it out will be a big help.  

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You might just want to meet up with one person over a cuppa or go out with your mates for a good old chin wag over a bottle of wine – the main thing is to get some human contact.  This is especially important right now when you are probably seeing fewer people than usual because everyone is working from home and meeting socially in a bar or restaurant is rather difficult.  In between face to face meetings make sure you chat on zoom or snapchat – it all helps!  

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Go on a digital detox

Chat with your friends digitally but perhaps limit your use of social media in other ways.  A number have studies have linked excessive social media use with depression, anxiety, sleep problems and body image and body confidence issues. Whether it’s creating a dream wedding way beyond your means on Pinterest or feeling inadequate when you look at the images of professional models and influencers on Instagram, social media can be a great source of dissatisfaction and anxiety.

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Following the news too closely, even at the best of times, can be a pretty negative experience – and these are not the best of times!  So tear yourself away from the screen, give your thumbs a rest , and take some us time…just the two of you, enjoying a special meal, taking time out to talk or watching an episode of a favourite show.    

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Rediscover the things that make you happy  

If you’ve been spending every evening with your Excel spreadsheets and lunch has been taken al desko while you chase up suppliers or check out the latest trends in wedding cakes/dress fashions/buddymoons then you need to call a “time out”.

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No matter how busy you are it’s essential to clear some space in your schedule to do things that help you relax, nourish your spirit and bring you joy.  It could be going for a walk, putting your feet up with a novel, soaking in a hot bath or baking chocolate chip cookies.  Just make sure you get that important ‘me time’ every day – a break from everything else going on in your life when you focus on no one else’s needs but your own.

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Make a “done” list

We’ve all got a “to-do” list.  So why not a “done” one?  “to-do” lists are obviously useful but they can make you feel overwhelmed and anxious.  So why not spend a little time every evening, or at the end of the week, making a list of all the things you’ve recently accomplished – it’s a great way to remind yourself of what you’ve achieved and to build up your self-esteem.   Makes sense, doesn’t it?  So do it!

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Get some exercise

Numerous studies show that physical exercise helps lower stress levels.  In the current situation you may be rather less active than you realise.  Maybe your daily commute is now between your bedroom and the kitchen – when you worked in an office there was probably a lot more walking involved.  And with lockdown you might have let your gym membership lapse and given up the yoga classes.  

The general recommendation from healthcare professionals is to take 150 minutes of moderate-intensity activity a week, and swimming, yoga or gentle walking are great places to start.  The evidence suggests this type of activity can reduce your risk of depression by 30%, improve sleep quality, increase self-confidence and help you manage stress and anxiety better.

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If possible try and combine that exercise with some fresh air – just getting out and experiencing a change of scenery certainly has a calming effect.

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Eat healthy

How do most of us respond to stress?  By comfort eating and drinking!   However, reaching for the nearest chocolate bar, pack of biscuits or glass of wine is not the answer.  It actually just makes you feel worse, physically and mentally – once the sugar rush or the alcohol buzz has passed we probably feel worse than before (and beat ourselves up as part of the deal!).  Plus putting on weight doesn’t help our state of mind (or dress size).  

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On the other hand a crash diet to reach your ideal wedding weight is not too smart either.  Severely restricting your calorie intake makes you feel lethargic and irritable – certainly not helpful for your mental health!

Much better to eat a healthy balanced diet of freshly prepared meals with plenty of vegetables.  Cutting down on your alcohol intake will also help you sleep better, as will switching to caffeine-free beverages like herbal or rooibos tea.

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Minimize your commitments

Taking on too much is a sure way to increase your stress levels so learn to say “no” more.  Your time and energy are precious and it isn’t selfish to set boundaries.  You don’t have to go to every party and volunteer for every project – but you do have to look after yourself.

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Learn to delegate  

Share your wedding planning workload with trusted bridesmaids, groomsmen, parents and friends.  There’s all sorts of time consuming tasks they could help with while you focus on the stuff you must do for yourself – like dress fittings, working out seating plans and going for tastings (essential!).

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Lean on us

We understand what you are going through and we’ve helped countless couples with the ups and downs.  We’re here to give you emotional support but you’ll also find that our experience and practical knowledge enables us to provide answers to many of the questions that are getting you down.

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The Covid crisis has certainly changed the way we tie the knot today.  But even before the pandemic upended everything weddings, and marriage, were undergoing subtle changes from one year to the next.  Go back to the time your grandparents wed, or just to the time when you were a twinkle in your parent’s eye, and you’ll discover just how different it all was not so long ago.  The statistics tell a remarkable story.  

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More marriages and more haste  

In 1970 out of every 1,000 unmarried adult women living in England and Wales in (single, divorced or widowed) 60 got hitched during the year.  Fast forward to 2017 and the number dropped to just 21.

What’s more, in 1970 the average age women got married for the first time was 21, to men who were two years older.  By 2017 it had risen to 30 for women and 31 for men.  

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An interesting slant on this is the fact that in 1970 a third of all brides gave birth less than eight months after the ceremony – do the maths!  In those days giving birth as an unmarried mother was severely frowned upon but by 2016 it was almost the norm - 48% of English and Welsh babies were born to unmarried mothers in 2016, up from 8% in 1970.

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Attitudes have changed  

NatCen Social Research, which runs annual surveys, found that in 1983 42% of Britons thought  sex before marriage was fine.  By 2016 this had climbed to 75%.  However, we’ve become less liberal in another way - all Britons, especially young ones, now take a more critical view of affairs.  As marriage becomes less common it is also being seen as more precious.

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For richer, for poorer

Marriage as a whole may be losing popularity but the picture is nuanced.  According to the Labour Force Survey in the first quarter of 2017, 65% of top professional adults in Britain were married.  However, amongst those in more routine jobs the figure was just 44%.  Amongst the unemployed and those who had never worked the proportion was even lower, at 40%.  

The class difference is even more marked when you look at women with young children. The Marriage Foundation charity calculates that 87% of women in the highest-earning quintile with children under five are married.  But in the lowest earning quintile the number is just 24%.

While marriage is favoured by well-off people it’s also popular with some ethnic minorities, especially immigrants and the offspring of immigrants from countries such as Bangladesh, India, Pakistan and Somalia, which have strong marriage cultures.  

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Harrow has the lowest proportion of births outside marriage (a mere 20%), reflecting the fact it is a middle-class London suburb where less than one-third of the population is white British.   At the other end of the scale comes Knowsley, a poor suburb of Liverpool where 19 out of 20 people are white Britons – here the rate is 75%.

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Split decisions declining

Marriages are becoming more resilient.  Among those who tied the knot in 1996, 11% had split up by the fifth year of marriage and 25% by the tenth.   But skip a decade and among those who wed in 2006, 8% had split by their fifth year and 20% by their tenth year.  This trend to longer lasting marriages continues.

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Meanwhile, in the rest of the world

It’s a similar picture.  Across Europe, with the exception of Belgium, highly educated women are less likely to have children outside marriage.  In America the better educated are more likely to be in wedlock than the rest and marriage rates are now higher among women with PhDs than among women with bachelor’s degrees.  

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American men seem to live quite uncomplicated personal lives - at the age of 45 those with university education tend to be hitched (88% of them).  About 75% of these are still with their first wife.  Men who did not finish high school are less likely to have married and, if they have, more likely to have divorced.

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Men behaving less badly

Married women nagging their husbands to “do more about the house” is a familiar refrain.  However, a recent study from Oxford University shows that although women still do more housework than men the gap has narrowed everywhere.   In 1974 British women spent 172 more hours a year cleaning, cooking and laundering than men.

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By 2005 the men were doing more of their share - women were putting in only 74 hours more than their partners.  In America a similar trend has been observed - the difference between the time married working women and men spent doing housework each day fell from 38 to 28 minutes between 2003-06 and 2011-15.

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What more do you need to know?

So, statistically speaking, you now understand a lot more about the subject of marriage and the latest social and economic trends.  It won’t help you with your planning for the big day but you’ll be able to impress your other half, family and friends with your amazing knowledge!  If there’s anything else we can help you with, wedding-wise, just get in touch – the team here are really well informed.

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Whatever plans you have for your big day there will be helpful friends and relatives who weigh in with advice on what you should and shouldn’t do.  Some of their suggestions may be really practical and helpful.  Others, however, will probably stem from ancient traditions that have become established over many generations and now have precious little relevance today.  Of these, many are based on nothing more than superstition – weird and wacky ideas from the time when people believed in dragons, witchcraft and evil spirits.  In this post we explore a few of these  – partly for fun and partly to help you navigate your way through the minefield of wedding customs, folklore and hocus pocus.

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Not seeing each other before the ceremony

This dates back to the time of arranged marriages and was intended to reduce the chance of a bride or groom deciding to do a runner once they’d caught sight of their intended.  Although arranged marriages are no longer as common most brides still prefer to keep their bridal-look a secret from the groom until the ceremony – so this idea does still serve a purpose.  

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Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue

Where the heck did this come from?!  It all goes back to the traditional rhyme that originated in Victorian England - the ditty that promoted the idea that, for good luck and a happy marriage, a bride must have on her wedding day "Something old, something new / Something borrowed, something blue / And a sixpence in her shoe."

The 'something old' symbolizes the bride’s past, her family and her values, and could be represented by a piece of jewellery or a similar token.  The 'something new' might be a gift from the groom or her family, and represents a new chapter in the bride’s life full of good fortune and happiness.  'Something borrowed' might be a bridal accessory lent by a happily married friend or family member to ensure the bride's marriage is just as happy as theirs. 'Something blue' represents the values of purity, faithfulness and modesty and could come in the form of a blue ribbon or brooch. Lastly, a sixpence in the bride's shoe, or even sewn into her dress, was supposed to promise lasting wealth for the couple.

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Catching the bouquet or garter

The general idea is that the bride tosses her bouquet or garter over her shoulder to the unmarried women in the company and the one who catches it will be the next to wed.

This has its roots in a medieval superstition that it was good luck to get a piece of the bride's wedding dress.  This quaint belief  sometimes resulted in a free for all scramble and a severely tattered dress.   So, to distract guests as the happy couple made their way to the marriage chamber, the groom would toss the bride’s garter into the following crowd.

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Carrying the bride over the threshold

This stems from an ancient Roman superstition, that persisted through medieval times, that evil spirits might curse a bride through the soles of her feet.   The groom was therefore advised to carry her to and through the doors of their new home to protect her, and their marriage, from misfortune.

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Right foot forward

This one is a bit like the old children’s superstition, ‘Step on a crack, break your grandmother’s back.’  This belief has it that the bride must step into the wedding ceremony venue with her right foot first for good luck.  

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Superstitions that are associated with good luck

·         Wednesday is allegedly the luckiest day on which to wed and Saturday is the unluckiest - something it’s worth remembering as you can’t currently get a wedding venue on a Saturday for love nor money!   An old rhyme from English folklore rules: "Monday for health, Tuesday for wealth, Wednesday best of all, Thursday for losses, Friday for crosses, Saturday for no luck at all."

·         Sprinkling the bride with wheat or rice was believed to bring fruitfulness.

·         Tossing coins over the heads of the bride and groom ensured good fortune.  Throwing shoes over their heads is also supposed to bring good fortune.

·         If a cat sneezes on the eve of the wedding that is a sign of good luck.

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Superstitions that are associated with bad luck

·         Getting married in a church where there is an open grave leads to bad luck.

·         Wearing a green dress is suppose to bring misfortune.

·         It is bad luck for the bride to look at herself in the mirror after she's dressed in her bridal wear.  However, if you do this by mistake the wearing/carrying of another accessory will break the bad spell.

·         Marrying someone whose surname begins with the same letter as yours is thought to bring bad luck: "to change the name and not the letter / is to change for the worse and not the better" goes an old rhyme.

·         A bridesmaid who stumbles walking to the altar will never be wed according to old lore - so watch your step or end up an old maid!

·         A sapphire in your wedding ring will bring happiness.  Pearls, due to their tear-drop appearance, will bring sorrow.  

·         According to an old wives’ tale, if the younger sister marries before her older sibling the latter must dance barefoot at the wedding or she will never marry.

·         Giving a couple a knife or a set of knives for their wedding gift is bad luck, as it signifies a broken relationship.

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Anything else you need to know?  

You probably have some more, rather more practical, questions about the practicalities of planning your wedding – the team at Clevedon are only too happy to answer them, so just ask away!

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Weddings are “go” again.  Well, sort of.  In England you can have a ceremony and a reception for up to 30 guests – provided you follow the Covid-safe guidelines.  So thousands of couples are now busily re-planning their (slightly smaller) Big Day.  In all the inevitable discussions about social distancing arrangements, revised catering requirements and scaled-down guest lists it’s easy for some other important matters to get overlooked.  The Order of Service being one of them.  In this post we take you through a standard Order of Service.  You don’t have to follow it exactly but it’s a useful starting point as you plan the exact details of your own ceremony.

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What is the Order of Service?

It is the order in which you go through the different stages of the wedding ceremony itself.  There are certain things you have to do to make the marriage legal - and other things you traditionally do to celebrate your love and make the occasion meaningful.  

Provided you satisfy all the legal requirements you can personalize certain aspects to make your ceremony a unique occasion.  You might stick closely to tradition or go a little bit quirky and original – it’s up to you.  Having said that, making it up as you go along, on the day, is not going to work!  You need to plan the different steps, and practice going through the whole thing from beginning to end, to make sure everything runs smoothly on the day.

In this post we set out the traditional Order of Service for a religious or civil ceremony and cover some of the main issues you’ll want to consider.  A celebrant-led wedding ceremony in England will be slightly different because the legal bits of the service will have to be performed afterwards or beforehand.

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Processional

This is the part where the bride, and bridal party, make their grand entrance.  The traditional way to do this in the UK is to have the groom and groomsmen waiting at the altar.   The bridesmaids walk down the aisle one by one, ending with the bride walked down the aisle by her father. If you are including flower girls and page boys in your ceremony then they’ll walk down the aisle just before the bride.  

Having said this you can do the processional any way you want and include whoever you choose to take part.  For instance, in a same-sex ceremony you could both walk down the aisle together.  

At a same-sex wedding, you may both choose to walk down their aisle, just one of you or perhaps you decide it isn't right for either of you. The processional is really completely up to you and you can choose which members of your wedding party and family take part.

The important thing is to decide who is going to be part of the procession, how they will line up (in view of the guests or out of sight?), what order will they follow and where will they stand once they reach the end of the aisle…then practice!

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Welcome and introduction  

Once the two of you are at the front and everyone has settled down the officiant will extend a welcome to all and set the scene.  You need to discuss with your celebrant what form of words you’d like.  If it’s a religious ceremony there may be a set formula to be followed but if not you and your celebrant can create a bespoke message that strikes just the right note for you and your guests.  It is customary for the celebrant to thank guests for bearing witness to your union, as well as welcome everyone to your venue and your celebration.  This will be an introduction and some thoughts on marriage. This could include a brief recounting of your love story, words on what marriage means to you, or a statement about the ceremony to come and what it represents.  

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Song or Reading

The welcome is traditionally followed by a song or hymn ceremony but you can replace this with a reading if you’d prefer.  Either way it further helps to set the tonev for what follows.

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The marriage ceremony

This begins with what is known as the “charge to the couple”.  The purpose of the charge is to remind you both of your individual duties and roles in the marriage and prepare you for the vows they are about to take.   This is also the part of the proceedings where the officiant asks if there’s any reason in law why the two of you should not marry.  

Then comes the exchange of vows. To make your marriage legal, there are certain declarations and contracting words you must say. However, the rest of your vows are up to you and you can choose to word them as you wish.  Because of the legal requirements you must run these past the registrar or religious officiant before the wedding as they can have strict rules about what you’re allowed to say.

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Exchanging of Rings  

This is a very symbolic part of the ceremony but exchanging rings is not a legal requirement.  The officiant will take the rings from the best man then in turn you each place a ring on the other’s finger whilst speaking a short dedication.

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Declaration of Marriage and First Kiss

The celebrant will now officially declare that you are married and say something along the lines of “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife” (or wife and wife, or husband and husband). They then give you permission to kiss - your cue to embrace amidst much clapping and cheering.  Don’t hurry this bit – give your photographer plenty of time to capture the moment!

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Optional Address, Prayers, Reading and Song

If it’s a religious ceremony the celebrant will usually say a few words at this point perhaps with a reading and a hymn.  If it’s a civil service it’s also a lovely moment for a reading or a song.

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Signing of the Register

This is another legal requirement so you can’t skip it – until the register is signed you are not fully wed in the eyes of the law.  You’ll need two witnesses to sign the register alongside you and your partner.  You can choose anyone to perform the role of witness but it’s customary for the maid of honour and the best man to do the honours.  This part of the ceremony does not involve your other guests so you probably need to decide on some music they can listen to while you are putting pen to paper.

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Ending of the Service

Your celebrant will round things up with some appropriate closing remarks - congratulations, well wishes and occasionally a few words of thanks.  

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Recessional and Exit  

You, the newly-wed Mr. and Mrs.(!), walk back up the aisle and head off to your reception party accompanied by the music of your choice.  Your wedding party will follow you out (usually in pairs) and then your guests will start exiting from the front row following you out.

Now it’s time to head off to the reception for some serious celebration!

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Any other questions?

We’ve just covered the basics here and there are a lot of other things you might like to consider.  Whatever questions or thoughts you have in mind please feel free to share them with us – the team at Clevedon Hall have a wealth of experiences and heaps of inspiring ideas to help you make your big day the best ever!

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The coronavirus pandemic has played havoc with wedding plans – more than 73,000 ceremonies have been postponed or cancelled since lockdown begun on 23 March.  Are all those couples going to go “hey, no worries, let’s forget the whole thing, for ever”?  I don’t think so!  That means there’s a huge backlog of events to be rebooked, on top of all the weddings already scheduled for the autumn and winter of 2020 and beyond.    

If you’ve got your heart set on a weekend wedding then a long delay is probably inevitable - even if the venue can fit you in some of your vendors might not be available.  The obvious solution, if you don’t want to wait months and months, is to go for a weekday wedding.  Although this may not be what you originally had in mind there are actually some big positives when you avoid the Saturday.  
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Wed on a weekday without so much delay  

If you don’t want to wait until 2021 then a weekday is possibly your only option – the likelihood of your venue and your vendors all being available on a Saturday this side of Christmas is on the anorexic side of slim!    
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Will my guests be able to make a weekday?

We understand your concern but given the circumstances, and the fact that Covid-19 is being so awkward, people are sure to cut you some slack.  Give your guests enough notice and they’ll make every effort to come and celebrate your big day, even if it happens to be a Monday!  We really don’t know how things are going to pan out so you may have to limit the numbers for quite a long while yet – in which case a few people dropping out may even be a blessing in disguise.
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Your budget might go a little further

Saturdays are going to be at a premium but some vendors might be grateful for bookings during the rest of the week.  Weekday discounts aren’t guaranteed but you might find a few suppliers who are open to the idea.  Accommodation rates for your guests may well be cheaper too so that’s another possible bonus.
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A weekday wedding can be more laidback  

Some venues can be pretty busy and raucous at the weekend – this is certainly the case with a city centre hotel or venues that can host several events simultaneously.  Wed on a weekday, however, and everything is likely to be a lot more chilled and relaxed.  
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Battle of the brides

With such a backlog of postponed weddings the chances of a date-clash are dramatically increased.  Tying the knot on a weekday makes a lot of sense as there’s a much better likelihood that all your guests won’t be otherwise committed.  
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Stretch the celebrations

If you make Monday your big day why not hold an activity or event on the Sunday evening to get the ball rolling.  Or have your nuptials on a Friday but organise something like a brunch for the Saturday.  That way, if some people can’t get time off work (like teachers, for instance) they can still come and help you celebrate.  Also, if wedding receptions continue to be limited to 30 guests you could have two different parties (one on the day before or the day after) and double your numbers.
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We’re here to help – just ask

These are difficult times and wedding planning has become even more complicated than before.  The team at Clevedon Hall are right “on it” in terms of the latest rules and current situation so whatever you have in mind they can certainly give you some invaluable input.  

 There has been a spinning blue circle hovering over the entire wedding world for many weeks, with more than 100,000 celebrations frozen by lockdown.  Soon, however, we’ll all be able to press “restart” and get things rolling again.  With this in mind it’s probably a good time to remind people why Clevedon Hall is a wedding venue that has an awful lot to recommend it!
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Creating the right atmosphere

The space, whether it’s a converted barn or a hotel ballroom, a marquee in a field or a posh restaurant, sets the whole tone for your wedding.  They all have their charms but few can match Clevedon Hall for sheer “wow!” factor.  It’s a grand mansion in the Jacobean Revival style, but not too grand.  The architecture is similar to Highclere House, better known as Downton abbey, but on a smaller scale.  Impressive, but not overpowering or intimidating, it was created as a family home, but one with splendid hospitality and lavish entertainment very much in mind.
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It won’t cramp your style

Clevedon Hall, unlike many other venues, is very flexible.  There’s a number of different rooms that can be combined in variety of ways to suit your particular needs. The Grand Library is perfect for formal banqueting.  The Great Hall makes a stately setting for receiving guests, enjoying drinks and canapes or dancing and partying late into the night.  
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There are great spaces for holding the wedding ceremony itself and smaller rooms for those who want to socialise in smaller groups.  There’s a separate bar so keeping the drinks flowing is no problem.  The orangery is a lovely light space in which to relax with afternoon tea, a cocktail or a soft drink.  Upstairs there are plenty of bedrooms and outside there are extensive gardens (more details below)  
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So, no matter what kind of wedding you have in mind, whether it’s a relatively small and intimate affair or something on a grand scale, you can mix and match these spaces in a variety of different ways – there’s plenty of flexibility and freedom to tailor everything exactly as you’d like.  This promises to be especially important while social distancing is a requirement – a situation that may be with us for quite some time.  
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The great outdoors

A venue where guests can enjoy themselves outdoors (but come inside if the weather turns nasty) is a real plus.  You can’t beat a social event under sunny blue skies – prosecco, a barbecue, live music, Pimms, fireworks, canapes on the lawn, children’s games…what’s not to like?!  
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With two and a half acres of gorgeous gardens, including a tree-lined drive, sweeping lawns and private lake Clevedon Hall really does how it all in terms alfresco entertaining.  

And if you really want to put the icing on the outdoor wedding cake there’s our gazebo.  This beautifully hand-crafted feature, with seating for 150 guests on the surrounding terrace, allows the bride to make a dramatic entrance along our winding path.  A perfect spot for your ceremony and photos!
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And so to bed

At Clevedon Hall we have 25 individually designed bedrooms that combine luxurious comfort with the very latest hi-tech facilities.  Each one is different, and charming in its own way – sumptuous furnishings and fabrics, period architectural features, stylish bathrooms and some with breath taking views of the gardens and sea.
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At the end of your big day, with many hours of eating drinking, dancing and socialising behind them, guest will really appreciate being able to stagger up the stairs and fall into a great big comfy bed!  So much better than waiting around for a taxi, a bit of a drive, then a night in a room that’s probably a bit soulless and functional.  
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Eat, drink and be merry

If music be the food of love…can we say the same is true in reverse?  The fact is that the eating and drinking experience can pretty much make or break a wedding.  From start to finish there are glasses of bubbly, dishes of canapes, wine flowing freely, a formal three course meal, port and brandy to round off the dinner, plentiful cups of tea and coffee, cakes and pastries, then beers, wines and cocktails late into the night, with evening food for hungry revellers.  
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That’s a big ask for any team but thankfully at Clevedon Hall we have our very own in-house chef with lashings of culinary talent and big helpings of industry experience. He is passionate about his food and loves to bring a couples’ imaginative foodie ideas to life for their special day.  When it comes to the wining and dining Clevedon Hall never fails to delight!
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Location, location, location

As the name suggests Clevedon Hall is in Clevedon.  That makes it easy to reach – we’re just five minutes from Junction 20 of the M5.   It’s only a 30 minute drive from central Bristol and from Bristol Airport, so very handy for you and your guests.  

Some venues are in remote rural locations that are hard to find.  With us it’s easy -   simply head for the seafront and you can’t go far wrong (Clevedon is not too big – it’ll only take you 5 minutes after coming off the motorway).
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The surroundings are very picturesque.  The Hall is cocooned in its own spacious gardens, with sweeping views of the Bristol Channel.  The town is charming too – a mini seaside resort that has retained its air of Victorian elegance and which your guests are sure to love.
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Exclusive use

Unlike a hotel, or many other venues, you can have the whole house, and the grounds, exclusively to yourselves.  There’s no sharing with other guests and our whole team is entirely focused on making your day everything you could wish for.
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All the help you need to create your perfect day

Our team of event management professionals provide everything from meticulous planning to inspired catering, with outstanding personal service to match – they specialize in exceeding expectations!  They’re also more than happy to share their extensive experience – so whatever questions you may have about the offering at Clevedon Hall, or about how to make your big day the best ever, just ask away!

We’ve hosted hundreds of happy couples for their big day at Clevedon Hall and have a lot of wonderful memories we share with them.  Those who’ve tied the knot over the last 12 months have their first wedding anniversary to look forward to – as have all those who are to wed in the months ahead.  Obviously this is a big event and calls for an appropriate celebration.  In this post we offer up a few suggestions to make the day, and night, suitably magical.  Some of these ideas won’t work while we’re all in lockdown or still have to practice social distancing but hopefully things will start to ease off a bit soon.
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Throw a party

Get your family and friends together for round two of your nuptials. The best idea is to get everyone together a Clevedon Hall again – we specialise in hosting amazing anniversary parties and can provide everything you need in terms of the food, the drinks, the accommodation and a band or DJ.  If your anniversary falls in the summer you’ll have the run of the gardens and grounds and we can arrange a BBQ, a hog roast, drinks on the terrace, outdoor fun and games, even fireworks!
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Anniversary getaway

Your first wedding anniversary is the perfect excuse for a romantic break.  If you managed to get away for a honeymoon then you might like to head back there.  Or maybe you had a honeymoon planned and had to cancel or reschedule it.  This is your chance to put that right!  It will probably take a while for the airline industry to return to business as usual so you may decide to opt for a staycation.  Our previous blog post about great honeymoon spots in the UK should give you some inspiration!   Wherever you decide to go it will give you some quality time together and allow you to reflect on your happy wedding day memories.
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Let us eat cake

It's traditional to eat the top layer of your wedding cake on your first anniversary.  In the old days a wedding cake was usually dripping with liqueur which helped preserve it.  Nowadays you’ll probably want to keep it fresh in the freezer.  Follow these tips carefully and it should be lovely in 365 days’ time.
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1. Immediately after the wedding, place the top tier of the cake in the freezer for a few hours to freeze the outer layer of icing.

2. Next, loosely wrap it with freezer-safe plastic wrap. Cover every inch of cake and ensure no piece remains exposed. This will help you to ward off the dreaded freezer burn.

3. Once wrapped, place the tier into a cake box (available from a local craft store, or ask your baker to provide one ahead of time.)

4. Wrap the cake box in the same plastic wrap to seal it from moisture, air, etc.

5. Finally, place the box in the back of the freezer for safekeeping.  

When your anniversary comes around retrieve your cake and find the most romantic spot imaginable to enjoy it.  It could be a moonlit beach, the spot where you first met, the place where he proposed…just choose somewhere that’s special for both of you.
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Say “I do” to adventure

Your honeymoon was all about romance.  And there’s no harm in recreating that magic.  But this time around you might decide there’s an opportunity to try something entirely different.  It can still be romantic but you might want to add in a bit of extra excitement, adventure and novelty.
 

The range of options is endless, from learning to surf in Cornwall to kayaking around Sweden’s picturesque islands, seeing the Northern Lights and staying in an ice hotel to a trip from London to Venice on the Orient Express.  A word of caution, however – nothing too extreme (cage diving with Great White Sharks or running with the bulls in Pamplona) as that might put a bit of a strain on your relationship!  Stick to stuff you’ll both enjoy and just doing the research and planning will be a bit of an adventure in itself!
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Masterchef it at home

A romantic meal for two is always a winner.  Just make sure you go totally overboard – loads of candles, set the table with all the “good” plates, cutlery, include napkins, flowers, a different wine glass for every course, the full works.  Three courses, at least.  And make a bit of effort with the recipes – beans on toast, a ready meal or cardboard pizza out of the freezer are not acceptable!   Something cheeky (Jamie), naughty (Nigella) or cosy (Delia) should do nicely.  

The drinks are obviously crucial.  A cocktail or something bubbly to start.  Wine with starter and main.  A dessert wine, possibly, or port, to round things off.  Then maybe a brandy, or a baileys?  But obviously watch the quantities as cuddling up afterwards is not good when the room is spinning round!  

Talking of the cuddling up…this is a great opportunity to watch your wedding video again.
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A night on the town

Date night – but it’s a big one so make sure you really push the boat out.  For starters, get glammed up.  Dinner at a favourite restaurant (or the first one you ever enjoyed together)?  A night at the theatre or a concert (with dinner before/after)?  A full-on afternoon tea followed by a movie?
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Pampering for the pair of you  

For a truly romantic break book a spa stay and indulge in a couple’s massage. It’s a great way to unwind together and spend time looking back on all the happy times you’ve had together (and plan more for the future).
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We’re here to help

We hope this list gives you some inspiring ideas and that your first anniversary is truly, madly, deeply wonderful.  If we can be of any further help don’t hesitate to get in touch.  The team here are more than happy to share their experience – and we’d be delighted to organise an anniversary party at Clevedon Hall if that’s something you’d like to do!

Just before Coronavirus rushed its way around the planet we were lucky enough to host this fabulous wedding for Bridget and George. The couple had their ceremony in our stunning Orangery made by David Salisbury. Day was captured by the amazing Jordanna Marston.

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Traditionally it is the man who proposes marriage.  However, there’s also another tradition that that women may propose to men, in a leap year, on the 29th of February.   As 2020 is a leap year, and the 29th of February is only about 48 hours away, we thought it timely to explore this topic in a little more detail.  If you pop the question to your beloved on the 29th you need to have the story straight.  And if he still hasn’t asked you well before the next leap year comes around in 2024 you can threaten to do it yourself!  
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Why women never popped the question

So where did this idea that only the man can do the asking come from?  The answer is “from a long way back”.  For as long as anyone can remember marriage has been largely an economic and political transaction.  Think of those boring history lessons you had to sit through where royals marriages were arranged to seal dynastic alliances, even though the two parties had never even seen each other.  Even in the 18th century finding a husband was probably the most important investment a woman could make in order to secure her economic future – just watch any Jane Austen movie (Pride & Prejudice, Sense & Sensibility, Emma, Persuasion) and you’ll realise that “marrying well” is more about the money and social advancement than the romance.
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Marriage was primarily a business transaction so the families would negotiate a deal - women were treated as property and would be traded from one family to another in exchange for land, offers of protection, or to secure her family's social position. In other cases, women were married off as a means of settling or paying a debt.  Women had no say in the matter – so the idea that they could propose was totally out of the question.

Around the late 1700’s people love and attraction started to come into the equation a little bit more.  However, popping the question remained a male prerogative.  Women had long been considered too emotional and irrational to be trusted to select a good husband, and that mindset continued to inform how love marriages evolved.  Also, men supposedly had more to lose by getting married and it was felt that this meant that they weighed things up more carefully than the flightier sex.
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What’s with this leap year exception to the rule?

There’s an old Irish legend has it that St. Brigid of Kildare, a fifth-century Irish nun, St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland, what could be done to help single women whose suitors were too shy to propose.  St Patrick initially gave women permission to propose only once every seven years.  However, St Bridged pushed for every leap year.  When he agreed Brigid then dropped to a knee and proposed to him immediately.  He refused but kissed her on the cheek and offered her a silk gown to take the sting out of the rejection.  The current Irish tradition still dictates that any man refusing a woman's proposal on this day must give her a silk gown.
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Scotland has a similar tradition that originated when an unmarried Queen Margaret allegedly enacted a law in 1288 allowing women to propose on leap-year day.  There was, however, an important clause that stated that the proposer must wear a red petticoat, giving any man who saw her bearing down on him the chance to do a runner if he wanted to avoid an awkward scene!

Both these stories are pretty suspect, it must be said.  Historians put St Brigid's age at 9 or 10 when St Patrick died, making the whole event pretty unlikely.  Queen Margaret was only 5 years old in 1288 and historians have also not been able to find any references to such a law.

What about the ring?

If the woman is the one doing the proposing that raises a few issues around the engagement ring.  Does she buy her own ring, to give him, so he can slip it on her finger?  Or does she buy a £1 ring from Poundland (really, they’re selling them!) and wait for him to get a more expensive one once he’s said “yes”?  Or does she present him with a luxury watch, then he buys her a ring in return?  

If you check out a few wedding forums you’ll find that there’s no hard and fast rule.  You’ll just have to somehow work it out between you!
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Where are we today?

A recent report suggests that in 97% of heterosexual couple it was the man who asked the question.  This is a bit surprising when you think how far women have come in terms of establishing equal status with men.  And women tend to find it easier to express their feelings than men – so it’s probably easier for them to do the asking than it is for some emotionally reticent bloke who finds it hard to put his love into words.  

Yet traditions that have taken thousands of years to cement themselves at the heart of our society are hard to break.  There’s nothing to say the woman can’t propose – but when all is said and done it might just be easier to use your charms to get him to do the asking!    
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Any other questions?

The team here at Clevedon Hall are pretty experienced in all things wedding and very happy to share their knowledge, tips and thoughts – just pop us the question (well, not that question!).